


Morgana's Voyage

by Acemindbreaker



Series: Three Sisters [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Ableist Language, Aphasia, Apraxia, Aromantic Character, Diapers, Disabled Character, F/M, Gen, Mental Regression, Supernatural Elements, Trauma, Wetting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-16
Updated: 2018-10-29
Packaged: 2019-08-03 03:31:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16318313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Acemindbreaker/pseuds/Acemindbreaker
Summary: Morgana was a fierce and brutal pirate queen, wreaking a bloody path through the high seas. As one of the three most powerful mages in all the land, no prison could hold her, and no one could stop her. Until her own sister Laurana, with the help of her kind-hearted friend Terald, tricked her and attacked her with a spell of her own invention.





	1. Chapter 1

“I think we should kill my sister.” My friend and sometimes lover Laurana said as she tended my wounds. She had two sisters, but I knew which one she meant. Morgana, the pirate queen, the one who'd just attacked our ship, stolen our cargo and killed several crewmates. Morgana, who'd just broken my arm and burnt me with a vicious spell attack. “Seriously. She's going to Peltarvel next, and she'll be there right around when we are. You distract her, and I'll take her out with her own invention.”

“The soul-steal?” I thought of Lirel's sightless eyes, after we'd found him dead by the dock. After several years, the sight still haunted me. We weren't supposed to have found him right away. We were supposed to have thought he'd just decided to leave, but I had a bad feeling and went looking for him. Laurana had tried to call up his soul, to ask him what happened, but it was shredded. “You think you can cast that?”

“I'm her sister.” Laurana said. “I'm just as strong as she is. She constantly underestimates me, just because I don't throw my power around to show off. She won't expect me to be able to pull it off.”

 

No one could stop Morgana. She'd been caught and imprisoned so many times, and every time, she'd escaped. She'd killed probably over a hundred sailors and guards, and stolen over a thousand dinars of goods. She was one of the most powerful sorceresses in the land, and absolutely ruthless.

I, on the other hand, was far from ruthless. I'm strange that way. No matter what horrible things a person has done, I can't harden my heart against them. I can't see a monster in place of a human being. Morgana used this against me, time and time again, tricking me into giving her a chance and then turning against me. This time, she'd faked love for my captain. I'd seen through her disguise, recognized her mannerisms, but I'd believed she was truly in love, so I'd kept her secret.

I'd always felt that I had an obligation to see the humanity in everyone. So when Laurana made her suggestion, I was hesitant. It took several months of mulling it over before I finally agreed to help her.

 

At the port, I found Morgana in an alleyway. “Hey, Morgana. You made a mistake, tipping us off to your location.” I told her.

She laughed. “You? What are you going to do? Try to talk me into being good?”

“As if it would work.” I said. “I learnt my lesson last time.”

“Oh, yes, with Captain Arturo.” She sighed. “He was so good in bed. Tell me, does he still miss me? Does he still pine over me?”

“Shut up!” I said. “I have a court summons for you.” I pulled out the paper Laurana had given me and waved it around.

“Oh, really?” She took the fake summons and raised her eyebrows. “Do you really expect this to concern me?”

“They've specially designed a cell, just for you.” I warned her. “Trust me, you won't be getting out of it alive.”

She narrowed her eyes. I'd hinted that I knew the cell design. Now, she'd start pumping me for information. “What makes you so certain?”

Just then, I saw a flash of purple behind her as Laurana finished her spell. I sighed. “Because you won't be going into it alive.” The spell hit, her eyes widened, and she collapsed.

 

Laurana and I scattered, hurrying off to our alibis. She went back to the ship to pack for her new assignment, and I returned to the bar to continue my drink. I felt sickened by what I'd just done. I kept seeing the look in her eyes as she felt the spell hit, imagining her eyes as blank as Lirel's.

I drank until the sight was blurred, and threw myself into dancing and partying.

It was early morning, still dark out, when I started to head back to the ship. I was sobering up and I just wanted to get a little sleep before I had to get to work. In three days we could leave this place, and I could try to leave behind the memory of what I'd done.

I tripped on a board and cursed. I'd always hated this port – a poorly-maintained menace. What did it matter if I had one more reason to hate it now?

Just then, a woman stepped out in front of me. It took me a moment to recognize her.

 

“Morgana?” I asked incredulously. I saw her die! But there was no mistaking that face, even though I'd never seen that particular expression on it.

“Nga.” She said, fear and confusion plain on her face. “Nngg.”

She couldn't talk? I'd heard of one survivor of the soul-steal, but I'd thought it was a myth. Apparently, his mind had been destroyed. He'd been left as helpless and innocent as a toddler. Could this have happened to her?

Morgana crossed her legs and put a hand in her crotch, a look of concern on her face. “Nngg!” She said, tears welling up in her eyes. I hesitated. I wouldn't put it past her to fake a mental injury in order to manipulate me. What if Laurana had botched the spell and Morgana was fine, and trying to trick me yet again? “It won't work, Morgana.” I told her. “I've been fooled too many times by you.” I put my hand on my sword.

Fear showed on her face. “Nga-nng!” She flinched, putting her hands up to block. Then, suddenly, her expression shifted to shame, and a wet blotch began to spread from the crotch of her pants.

I couldn't imagine the proud Morgana deliberately wetting her pants, not even as a trick. “I'm sorry.” I pulled my hand from my sword and moved to her side. “Come on, I'll get you cleaned up.”

Relief showed clearly on her face. She followed me as I headed to my room. There, I got a pair of my pants—big on her but still workable. Then we went back out and I washed her in the river mouth. She tried to help change her pants, but she couldn't do it, so I took over.

As I'd been helping her, though, another thought occurred to me. What if she recovered? Right now, she was vulnerable, more vulnerable than I'd ever seen her. It could be my only chance to finish her off—she'd never fall for the same trick twice.

If it were Laurana, or virtually anyone else I knew, they'd have killed her immediately. But I hesitated. What if she never did recover? As she was now, she posed no threat to anyone. If she stayed this way, killing her would be wrong.

I needed more information. Which meant I should probably give up on getting some sleep right now.

 

I took Morgana to a doctor I knew of. He was quite competent, and not too expensive. Most importantly, he was so out of touch with the news that he'd likely never have heard of Morgana. If he had, he certainly wouldn't know her face.

“Greetings, Terald, my old friend!” He exclaimed. “And who is this lovely lady?” He turned to Morgana, who was trying to get his fountain to give her water.

“Nngg.” She replied, as he took the cup from her, cast the spell to activate the fountain, and filled her cup.

“I'm afraid she hasn't told me her name.” I lied. “She was the victim of a magical attack. I was wondering if you could assess her and tell me how best to help her.” If he gave good hope for a recovery, I would kill her as soon as we left his office. I didn't want to, but I would.

He cast some spells on her, made her do some cognitive tests, and finally sighed. “Very nasty spell. I'm afraid her soul is shredded. She may recover cognitively, but I'd put the odds at a thousand to one. And her magic is gone completely. Even if she recovers enough to try it, she won't be able to so much as create a light.”

Morgana without magic? She used magic for all of her bad deeds. Especially her escapes. None of her escapes from jail would have been possible without magic. I sighed in relief. I wouldn't have to kill her. In the unlikely event that she regained her cognition, I'd just turn her in.

Mistaking my sigh, he added: “It's worse. The spell is still acting on her. For the next couple months, she will steadily lose skills.” Morgana glanced at him in concern, almost as if she understood what he was saying. He looked back at her in sympathy. “She should stabilize by three months from now, but I can't say where she'll be at cognitively by then.”

“I was hoping she'd be able to tell us who did this to her.” I sighed.

“Oh, no, even if she recovers fully, she'll have no memory of the attack.” He said. “She won't have been able to turn short term memory into long term.”

That explained why she wasn't more afraid of me. She didn't know I'd kept her talking while her sister charged up the spell. “Does she understand what we're saying?”

“Most of it, yes. After all, she could follow many of my commands when I tested her.” He pointed out. “But whether she understands my comments on her prognosis? You'd need a telepath to tell that. My guess is she doesn't understand it, since judging from her test scores, she's at about a three year old level right now.”

“Thank you, doctor.” I said. “Come on, let's go.”

 

Next, I took Morgana to one of my shadiest contacts—Kilara, a skilled illusionist. It was whispered that she provided disguises for people looking to hide their identities.

“Kilara, I need a disguise for my friend.” I said as I walked in, trailing Morgana behind me. “I've got money to pay you.”

“Nng!” Morgana exclaimed, looking around the place. She yawned, showing her tonsils. “Nnga-nngh.”

Kilara looked at her oddly, then nodded. “Very well. I have just the thing for her. One moment.”

She headed to the back, and turned to Morgana. “There's a lot of people who don't like you for what you've done.” I explained to her. Myself included, I thought but didn't add. “Kilara's going to give you something to wear, and I want you to wear it always, to keep you safe. And I won't be calling you Morgana, I'll be calling you Silva.”

“Nngg.” Morgana said. How much of that had she understood? I couldn't tell.

Kilara returned with a necklace, which she expertly fastened around Morgana's neck. “There you go.” She said, as Morgana's facial features shifted into a woman I'd never seen before.

“Nga.” Morgana said, fingering the necklace with interest. I batted her hand away.

“Don't touch that.” I turned to Kilara. “How much will that be?”

I paid the amount she specified, and she took me aside. “By the way, I can recognize Morgana when I see her. What's happened to her?” Morgana looked at us curiously, most likely unable to make out what she was whispering.

“A murder attempt.” I said, normal volume. “Hence why she needs the disguise. You will keep this quiet? Her would-be killer doesn't know she survived.”

“Of course. All customers are promised confidentiality.” Kilara said, also normal volume. “Is she likely to recover soon?”

“Nngg.” Morgana said sadly.

“No. She never will.” I said.

“Good.” Kilara said, and turned to Morgana. “Couldn't wish this on a more fitting person, you murderous bitch. I hope part of you understands what's happened to you, oh high and mighty pirate queen.”

Morgana looked shocked and hurt. “Nnngh.” She said, tears welling up in her eyes.

Kilara smiled. “Don't worry, I didn't mean it.” She said insincerely, watching a tear trickle down Morgana's face. “Have a nice life, Silva.”

Morgana smiled back tentatively, confused. I took her by the arm. “Come on.”

 

I led her back to our ship. The sun was well and truly up by now, and I was exhausted. “Hi, Brevald!” I greeted the guardsman.

“Terald, I was wondering where you were!” Brevald exclaimed. “Found some company for the night? She's alright, if you're into that.”

“Nngg?” Morgana replied, confused.

“Unfortunately, no.” I said. “A friend of mine has a mentally disabled cousin. Her parents died unexpectedly, and I owe him a favour, so I agreed to see if she could find a place on this ship, with me looking after her. Silva, say hi to Brevald.”

“Nngay.” Morgana said. I paused. It sounded like she was actually trying to say it.

Brevald chuckled and waved. “Hi, Silva.” He said. “You two look tired. You could probably get a couple hours sleep before the work begins.”

I nodded and led Morgana inside. As we were heading to my cabin, she suddenly stopped. “Nngg.” She said, crossing her legs and jiggling.

“OK, let's go to the bathroom.” I said, and led Morgana there. Remembering when I'd cleaned her up, I pulled her pants down and looked away as she sat on the toilet.

She did her business, wiped herself, then got up. Pants around her ankles, she flicked her fingers at the toilet.

“Remember, the doctor said you've lost your magic.” I told her, flicking my own fingers to make it flush. Morgana stared at it mournfully as I pulled her pants back up.

“Come on, wash your hands.” I told her, turning the stream on with another spell. If she did recover her mind, she'd need adapted equipment in jail. I'd never really thought about how much we did with magic.

Reluctantly, Morgana washed her hands, and I led her back to the cabin. She made a small sound just as we arrived, and I turned to see her crying. She looked at me with an expression of despair.

“You know what you've lost.” I said, realizing it myself. Did she also understand that she'd never get it back? “Oh, Morgana.”

I led her inside and sat her on my bed, wondering how I was supposed to comfort her, when I was actually glad she was like this. It meant she'd never hurt anyone again, and I didn't have to kill her.

“Morgana, listen. It'll be OK.” I said. “Your old life is gone, but you can make a new life, with me. I'll take care of you. I'll be your friend. How many real friends did you have before?”

“Nngg. Nngg.” Morgana sobbed, watching her tears fall on her hands, curled in her lap. She looked up at me. “Nnga-nngh!” She said sadly.

“Yes, I know.” I said. She chose her life. From her perspective, she must have thought it was a pretty good life. She'd had plenty of chances to change, and she hadn't. And suddenly, through no choice of her own, she lost it all. She may not understand exactly what happened to her, but she knew she couldn't do things she used to do. She might know she was at the mercy of a former enemy. She might know that someone tried to kill her, and she was powerless to stop them if they tried again. “I'll keep you safe.” I offered her a hug and she accepted.

After awhile, she subsided into sleep. I brushed her tears away, then went to sleep on the floor. I'd better get what sleep I could. This day was going to be tough.

 

After about three hours, I awoke to the bugle and moaned. “Nngg...” Morgana complained, echoing my feelings. I stretched, and reluctantly got up.

Morgana looked at me blearily. “You can sleep in.” I told her.

She rolled back, started to close her eyes, and then shook her head and sat up. “Nnga.” She declared.

“OK, then, let's get changed.” I stripped and put on new clothes. I didn't have a change of clothes for her, so I let her keep her existing clothes on.

All dressed, we headed out. On the way, Morgana stopped at the bathroom. “Nngg.”

“You need to go? OK.” I held the door for her, then helped her get her pants down. She did her business, and grabbed at the toilet paper, but didn't wipe herself. She'd lose skills, the doctor had said. Or maybe she was just too tired? I grabbed it for her and wiped her, then washed my hands before helping her flush and getting her pants back on. She looked ashamed as I did this.

“Don't worry, there's no shame in needing help.” I told her cheerfully.

“Nngh.” She replied, looking unconvinced.

 

After breakfast, during which Morgana ate with her fingers and got her face messy—I went straight to Captain Servanes and told him the story I'd told Brevald. He nodded. “I had a nephew like that. Well, Silva, can you swab the deck?”

She reluctantly accepted the mop, and began swabbing clumsily and with much concentration. “I guess she can. Alright, I'll take her on, but I'll have to reduce your pay a bit to afford her food. She'll be sharing with you, OK?” I nodded. It wasn't good news, but it wasn't unexpected either. “And Terald, we have all these crates to unload. Don't worry, the others will keep an eye on Silva.”

I set to work, checking in with Morgana every time I came for another load. “How're you doing, Silva?” I called out.

“Nngg.” She replied, swabbing morosely. No doubt she used to look down on deck-swabbers, and now it was a task that took all of her concentration.

“You're doing a good job.” I told her, grabbing the next crate.

Next pass, I found her standing at the rail. “She's taking a break.” Pira, another deck-swabber, commented helpfully.

I nodded. “Keep up the good work, Silva.” I said. She glanced at me, then looked back to the sea. I grabbed another crate.

Just as I was returning, I heard a splash. “Person overboard!” A new crewman yelled, and I ran over to see Morgana slipping underwater, spluttering.

I stripped down to my pants and jumped in. I swam over and grabbed her with one arm, then grabbed a rope someone had helpfully extended. “Nngg.” Morgana said, the sound distorted when a crest of water hit her mouth. She coughed.

I hauled her out, and Sorelk the cook put a blanket around her. “Poor dear. She didn't know any better, just climbed over the rail and jumped in.”

I nodded. I must have been overestimating her. The doctor had said she was at a three year old level. Would a three year old be trusted not to jump overboard? Morgana was shivering when I glanced at her.

“You go get her into some dry clothes.” Captain Servanes said. “When you're done, we'll put her on a line.” During a storm, anyone out on deck had to be on a line, in case the waves washed them overboard. Morgana clearly needed to be on one even when the sea was calm.

The new first mate generously offered Morgana a set of her own clothes, and I dressed her in it. Warm and dry, Morgana and I came back out.

“Here.” Captain Servanes handed me a small disk. I put it to Morgana's chest, and it became a floatation vest, with a glowing cord connecting it to the mast.

“Nngg!” Morgana seemed annoyed as she pulled at the vest, trying to get it off. She batted at the cord, which phased through her hand, and then she looked at me. “Nngg.”

“It's for your own good.” Captain Servanes assured her. “She won't be able to get it off?”

She couldn't pull her own pants down. “No.” I said, and handed her the mop. “Here, Silva, get back to work.”

She sighed and grabbed the mop. “Nng.” She said in a resigned tone as she resumed watching.

“Good job, Silva!” I said, and went back to work myself.

 

Later that day, after my post-lunch nap, Laurana came to see us. Morgana stopped when she saw her, getting an excited look. “Nngg!” She ran over and hugged Laurana, who looked startled.

“Silva!” I exclaimed, tugging her off. “Sorry, one of my friends asked me to take care of his mentally disabled cousin. Silva, this is my friend Laurana.”

“Nngg!” Morgana exclaimed, looking at me incredulously. “Nga-nngh-nnga!”

Laurana smiled. “Pleased to meet you, Silva.” She turned to me. “I need to talk to you.”

“You keep mopping, Silva.” I handed her the mop. Morgana took it, but hesitated.

“Nngg.” She looked at Laurana. “Nngg!”

“Go on, Silva.” Laurana urged her. “I need to talk to your friend Terald now.”

Morgana looked disappointed, but she resumed swabbing. Laurana and I walked away. As soon as we were out of earshot, she spoke. “Morgana's body is gone.”

Yeah, I knew where it was. But if I told her, she wouldn't accept the doctor's word—she'd insist on killing Morgana while we could. Laurana was more ruthless than I was. “I moved it.” I lied, and she looked relieved. “I weighed it down and stuck it in the sea.”

“You should have told me!” Laurana exclaimed.

“I couldn't find you.” I said. “Anyway, you know now.”

“Yeah, I guess.” She said. “Good thinking.”

I shrugged. “If they figured out how she died, they'd look for a very strong mage like you. And you have obvious motive.” I said. “If she just disappears, they'll think she's gone into hiding again.”

“Yeah, it just freaked me out.” Laurana said. “I just find it hard to believe that she's gone. I keep expecting this to be another of her tricks. It just seems too easy.”

“Yeah.” I could understand that.

“Anyway, I'd better get going. But our ship's headed to Klarsus, so we'll meet up there.” Laurana said.

She left, and I headed back to Morgana. “Hey, Silva.” I said.

“Nngg?” She looked at Laurana, who was walking away. She pointed, then glanced back at me. “Nngh! Nga-nngh!”

She clearly wanted to spend time with Laurana. Did she remember how Laurana had turned against her, or did she just think of Laurana as her sister? “She has to get back to work.” I said. “Besides, she doesn't recognize, remember? Kilara gave you that illusion spell.”

Morgana touched her necklace. “Nnggh.” She said, realization dawning.

“Don't touch that.” I warned. “If you take it off, no one will want you here. They might even hurt you. Someone tried to kill you, remember? That's why you can't talk now.”

“Nngg.” Morgana pulled her hand away, looking scared.

 

Later that day, I took Morgana shopping. “Let's go to the used clothing store.” I said. “I know you usually go for fancier clothes, but I can't afford it.”

“Nngg.” Morgana said agreeably, following me inside.

“Let me know if you spot something you like.” I said.

“Nngg.” Morgana repeated. “Nngh-nngg.”

We started searching through the stacks. “Do you like this one?” I asked her, holding up a shirt.

“Nngg!” Morgana nodded.

I proceeded to get a stack of clothes for her, and got her to approve each one. She seemed to be enjoying herself—first time I'd seen her this happy since Laurana attacked her. I found myself smiling back as she grinned at me.

Then I came across a pack of adult diapers and supplies, and paused. Morgana didn't need these yet, but she would continue to lose skills. Would she need them soon? I'd better get them—it would be hard to buy them while traveling.

I slipped the pack under the clothes. I didn't know if Morgana would recognize what they were, but if she did, I didn't want to upset her. “Do you think that's enough clothes?”

“Nga!” She shook her head, grabbing a shirt covered in sequins. “Nngg-nngg!”

“I don't think that'll fit you.” I said.

“Nngg!” Morgana hugged it to her.

“OK, we'll get that. But let's go now.” I said. We went through the till, and then both of us carried two bags each of clothes back to the boat. Morgana smiled the whole way back.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Terald and Morgana set sail. As the doctor predicted, Morgana's functioning continues to deteriorate, but another doctor she sees may have a solution. Meanwhile, they have a tense encounter with a couple of Morgana's former goons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains an ableist slur, used by a minor villain.

A couple days later, the boat set sail. Morgana smiled and waved at the shore happily. “Nngg-ngih!” She yelled.

“Is this the first time you've gone sailing, Silva?” Arianna, a new crew member, asked her.

“Nngg.” Morgana shook her head, smiling. I sighed inwardly. It would have been better if she'd lied, but she probably didn't understand that. “Nng-nngh.” She swung her legs to sit on a box, and then abruptly sprang up and ran over to start climbing the mast.

“Agile, isn't she?” Brevald commented.

“I guess so.” As I watched her climb, I shuddered at the memory of the swordfight she'd had with Dorlan. She'd spent much of that fight climbing on the mast and leaping around. She had lost some agility since then, but she was still quite impressive. I firmly reminded myself that she'd be having no more battles, no more killing.

“Nngg!” She called out, then climbed back down. She came up to me and tugged on me. “Nngh.”

“What do you want?” I asked.

“Nngg.” She pulled me off towards our room, then stopped in the hallway, looking confused. She stared up and down the hallway, crossing her legs. “Nngg!”

“You need to go to the bathroom?” I asked.

“Nngg?” She looked around in confusion, then her face cleared. “Nngh!” She nodded.

I led her to the bathroom and helped her go, meanwhile wondering about her behavior. She'd been a lot more clear about when she needed to go before now. Good thing I'd gotten the diapers—if she stopped telling me in a way I could understand, she would need them.

She went back out and resumed her playing, unconcerned.

 

Over the next few days, we settled into a routine. Morgana alternated between swabbing the deck and climbing the mast. I noticed her getting confused more easily, but she managed OK with my help.

“Terald!” Arianna called out one day, leading a dismayed Morgana behind her. “Silva wet herself.”

“Nng.” Morgana said sadly.

“Oh, don't worry.” I told her. “I'll get you cleaned up.”

“Nngg.” She said, following me. I washed her, got her changed and patted her on the back. “Nnga?”

“Remember, if you need to go, just let someone know.” I said. “Doesn't have to be me—plenty of others would help you if you asked.”

“Nngg.” She said, looking downcast.

“Hey, cheer up.” I said. “You've been doing great! You're a great deck-swab, a real big help.”

“Nngh?” She smiled and followed me back to the hallway she'd been swabbing. “Nngg-nguh!” She lifted the mop proudly.

I sat and watched her work. “She seems to be happier now.” Arianna said. “She was so upset when she wet herself. I thought she was going to burst into tears.”

“How did it happen?” I asked. “Did she act like she needed to go?”

“I guess, yeah, but I didn't know what she wanted.” She said. “She got up and started looking for something. I asked her what she wanted, and she started trying really hard to say something. Poor Silva.”

 

Morgana wet herself several times over the next few weeks. Sometimes she tried to communicate it but didn't get her point across well enough—for one thing, she'd mostly stopped crossing her legs. Other times she didn't show any reaction until she'd started peeing. One time, she even pooped her pants. She also wet the bed several nights in a row.

Finally, after finding her wet again one morning, I got tired of cleaning her up. “OK, Silva.” I said, pulling out a cloth diaper. “I think you need this now.”

Morgana looked at it. “Nngg.” She said, shaking her head.

“You may not like it, but it's better than wetting yourself.” I fastened it on her, sealed it in place with a spell, and pulled the waterproof cover on over top. She reached down to touch it. “Leave it be.”

“Nnga-nngg.” She tugged at the diaper, as if trying to take it off. I pulled her hand away, and she shook it free of my grip angrily. “Nngg!” She pulled her hand back and tried to slap me, but I grabbed it. My heart beat faster at the look in her eyes—proud and angry. It made me remember...

“It's just in case.” I assured her, pulling her pants on and trying to regain my composure. “If you let me know in time, we'll do the same as before.”

I led her out. “Nngg.” She kept tugging at her pants. “Nng-nngh nngg.”

“I know it feels uncomfortable, but you'll get used to it.” I told her.

“Nngg.” Morgana complained.

“What's up, Silva?” Goretz the cook asked as he came by with a pot of waste to throw overboard.

“Nngg-nga-nngh.” She said in annoyance.

“I don't know. She doesn't seem to like the feel of her clothes this morning.” I said. I didn't feel like telling him about her diaper.  
“Nngg.” She commented, shaking her head.

“Well, I hope you're feeling better soon.” Goretz said. “See you at breakfast, Silva.”

I realized something and turned to her as he left. “Silva, everyone here likes you. Haven't you noticed that?”

“Nngg.” She tugged at her pants, seeming not to hear me. “Ngi-nng.”

“Ah, well. Time for breakfast.” I led her off.

 

Over the next few days, I helped her to use the bathroom a few times, but more and more, she'd come to me for help and I'd find her diaper already wet. Occasionally, she'd wet herself without even seeming to notice, and I'd find out later when I happened to check her.

Soon, we arrived at the next port. I took Morgana for a walk around town. “Have you ever been to Chlorblen before, Silva?” I asked her.

“Nngg.” She looked around, smiling and pointing at things.

As we walked, we came upon a couple of thugs talking to a scared-looking man. I hesitated. Those thugs looked familiar...

“Tell us where Morgana is!” One of the thugs yelled, shoving the man. “You did something to her, admit it!”

“Nngg!” Morgana ran up to them, waving her hands.

“Silva, get away from them!” I exclaimed.

“Nngg-nga-nngh!” She said. “Nngg!” This was bad. She was trying to tell them who she was. If they figured it out, I doubted they'd treat her well. Morgana tended to attract greedy, selfish minions, not loyal ones. If they knew she was helpless, they'd have no reason to treat her kindly. My best hope was to get her away without them realizing who she was. Fortunately, she seemed to have forgotten about the illusion necklace.

“Hey, retard, get out of the way!” One of the men shoved her aside. Morgana fell to the ground and looked up at him in dismay. “What are you looking at me like that for?”

“Nngg. Nng-nngh.” Morgana whined. Tears welled up in her eyes. She looked up at them pleadingly.

“Silva!” I yanked her to her feet. “Don't mind her, we'll get going right away.”

“Nngg!” Morgana resisted my tugging.

“Hey, isn't that the guy who came yelling at Morgana about that captain she seduced?” The one man asked.

I froze. Oh, crap. “Um, you must have me confused with someone else.” I said nervously. Morgana shot me a confused look. “Let's go, Silva!”

One of the men yanked her from my grasp. “Nngg!” She exclaimed, startled. She looked between the two men, confused and fearful, then glanced at me. “Nngh.”

“Tell us what happened to Morgana, or I'll hurt this girl.” The man warned. He squeezed her arm, and she whimpered.

What should I do? If I didn't tell them, they'd hurt Morgana. If I did, what would they do to her? How could I get us out of here?

The man they'd been threatening suddenly kicked the man holding Morgana. Immediately, she twisted free, dancing out of reach and smiling mockingly. “Nngg!”

“Let's get out of here.” The man said, and the three of us ran.

 

As soon as we were safely away, Morgana buckled over, curling up on the ground. “Nngg. Nngg. Nngg.” She whimpered.

“It's OK, Silva.” I pulled her into my arms. “We're safe now. I'll protect you, remember?”

“Sorry you two got mixed up in this.” The man said. “How about you come have tea with me? I'll make it up to you.”

“How about that, Silva?” I asked her.

“Nngg.” She whimpered, hugging me tightly.

I got up, with her still holding onto me, and we went back to his house. “So, who did they think you were?” The man asked.

I chuckled. “They were right, actually.” I said. “I had many run-ins with Morgana.” She glanced at me as I said her name. “But I had nothing to do with her going missing this time. I figure she's just gone into hiding.”

“Yeah, I agree.” He said. “Morgana's a slippery one, all right.”

“Nngg?” Morgana asked.

“Do you want more tea, Silva?” He asked, pouring her another cup. She drank it happily. “I'm actually investigating her. I'm supposed to bring her back to jail.”

“Nngg.” Morgana said. “Nngh-nga.”

Should I tell him? No, I didn't want Morgana to go to jail the way she was now. She was no threat to anyone right now. “I'm sorry, I don't have any idea where Morgana is. I've been kept busy by Silva here.”

“Nngg.” Morgana looked confused. “Nga?”

“Just tell me what you do know about her.” He said.

“Very well.” I said. Then I told him everything except for Laurana's attack and the results. I shook my head sadly. “Even if you catch her, you know she'll just escape.”

He sighed. “That's the jailkeeper's concern.” He said. “They claim to have a new specially designed cell to hold her. I hope they're right.”

 

Morgana refused to leave the ship for the rest of our stay in Chlorblen. I couldn't blame her, after what had happened. I wished I could get in contact with Laurana and warn her about the thugs, but I wouldn't see her for several months yet.

Another problem was that Morgana seemed to have completely stopped nodding or shaking her head. It seemed like a small thing, but it meant a lot less ability to communicate. Which also meant that she started throwing fits when she didn't like what I did.

“Do you want more bread, Silva?” I asked one time as we were eating lunch.

“Nngg.” Morgana waved her hands.

“OK, I'll give you more.” I put another hunk of bread on her plate.

“Nngg-nngh!” She slapped the bread, sending it flying, and glared at me.

“Silva, just tell me. If you want it, nod your head, like this.” I demonstrated for her. “If not, shake your head, like this.” I demonstrated that too.

“Nngg.” Tears welled up in her eyes. “Nga-nngg!”

“It's OK, you don't have to eat it.” I reassured her. “Calm down, just eat your other food.”

“Nngg!” She looked at me emphatically, glanced at the bread on the floor, then sighed and resumed eating. “Nngg-nngg.” She said sadly, her voice muffled by a mouthful of food.

I patted her on the back gently. “It must be so frustrating not to be able to communicate.” I commented.

 

We soon arrived in the next port. Morgana eagerly went exploring with me, though she got mad when I refused to let her drink alcohol. Somehow, I didn't think it would be appropriate.

I knew a good doctor in this town, so I decided to bring Morgana for a second opinion. “I have to swear you to secrecy, Merlin, about this case.” I told him. “My crewmembers think she was born this way. For her own safety, I'm keeping her identity a secret.”

“Nngg.” Morgana commented.

“She was attacked by a strong magical spell three weeks ago.” I said. “The spell was intended to kill, but instead it did this.”

“Nngg-nga!” Morgana confirmed, looking emphatic.

He examined her and confirmed the previous prognosis, with one exception. “She will never recover her mind.”

“The other doctor said she might, but the chance was slim.” I commented.

“If her spirit had mounted an effective defence, she may have recovered.” He said. “In that case, instead of regressing over the past weeks, she would have improved slightly.”

“Well, she certainly has regressed.” I said, looking at Morgana. She smiled and waved a stethoscope at me. “She used to go to the bathroom with help, now she wears diapers. She used to indicate yes and no, now she doesn't.”

“My tests indicate she's at a two year old level overall, with a weakness in speech.” He said. “She could follow simple commands, with gestures, but she didn't show any expressive speech.”

“Nngg!” Morgana exclaimed.

“Just nasal sounds. And pointing.” He added. “She did extremely poorly on spatial reasoning—she was basically answering at random. Her biggest strengths are in motor coordination. In fact, her motor coordination appears to be unaffected. She's probably better coordinated than I am.” He chuckled, smiling at Morgana.

“Nnggi!” Morgana grinned back.

He nodded, then sobered as he turned to me. “Sorry I don't have better news.” He said. “I do have these pills. If she takes them for a month, they will flush the spell out of her system faster, and she won't regress as much. But nothing can get back what she's lost.”

“Thanks, doctor.” I accepted the pills.

He shook his head. “I hope they catch Morgana and burn her alive for this one.”

“Nngg.” Morgana whimpered, alarmed.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“The soul-steal spell is quite distinctive.” He said. “I've only heard of one person who uses that spell. Whoever this this young lady is, she's another of Morgana's victims.”

Morgana looked confused. “Nngg.”

“Oh, sorry, am I scaring you?” He patted her on the shoulder, then turned to me. “You take good care of her, OK? She's a survivor, that's for sure.”

“I will.” I promised. “Come on, Silva.”

I hadn't thought of pretending she was one of Morgana's victims, but it made a good cover story. And when she got upset hearing bad things said about Morgana, I could explain that as trauma.

 

“Come on, Silva, take your pill.” I pleaded the next morning, chasing her around the bedroom.

“Nngg!” She said angrily as I finally caught her. “Nngg!”

“It's good for you.” I dropped it into her open mouth, and as she was gagging I poured a cup of water in after it. She choked and swallowed, then pulled free.

“Nngh.” She said, a hurt look on her face.

“I'm sorry. But it will help you.” I said. “You know how you forgot how to say yes or no, and forgot how to go to the bathroom before that? This will make you forget less.”

“Nngg.” She said, heading to the door. Did she understand what I'd said? I couldn't tell.

She went out on deck and looked around. “Here, let's go have breakfast.” I said, leading her to the mess hall. As I walked with her and dished out our food, I thought. It wasn't much fun force-feeding her pills. I sure hoped she got more tolerant of it.

The skills she'd lost already had been upsetting. I didn't want her to recover, but I'd rather she keep what skills she had. In particular, if she lost the ability to swab the deck, it would be a lot harder to justify her staying on board with me. And not only did she need me to hide her identity, but she loved sailing so much.

I glanced at Morgana, who was grinning with a face covered in gravy. “Nngg!” She said, showing a mouthful of half-chewed meat. I smiled.

“Did you always love sailing?” I asked her softly. “Even before your injury?”

“Nngg.” She said, taking another bite of food.

 

After a couple days, Morgana had accepted the pills, though she still didn't like them. However, she'd started wandering off and getting upset for no apparent reason. “What's the problem, Silva?” I asked, finding her in the hallway early one morning.

“Nngg! Nngg!” She ran over and hugged me. “Nngg!”

“What's this for?” I asked. “You're crying.”

“Nngg.” Morgana said, letting me go, but still holding my arm.

“Come on, let's get you changed.” I said, leading her back to our room. “Now, let's get your shirt off.” I pulled it over her head.

“Nngh.” She commented, passively cooperating as I put her new shirt on. I pulled her pants off, changed her diaper, and started to pull another pair of pants on, but she kicked it away. “Nngg.”

“You want a different pair?” I asked.

“Nngg!” She replied emphatically. I pulled out another pair, and she moved away. I set it aside and got out a third pair, and she grabbed at it. “Nngg-nngh!”

“OK, let’s get these on.” I slipped her legs in, then pulled them up. “Now, take your pill.”

She accepted them reluctantly, and then we headed towards the mess hall. As we were walking, Morgana paused to look through a porthole. I walked ahead, expecting her to catch up, but just as I turned the corner I heard a panicked: “Nngg!”

I hurried back to her side. “Are you OK?” I asked. Morgana immediately hugged me. What was going on? Was she losing another skill? I couldn't think of a skill loss that would explain this. Maybe she was being bothered by something and couldn't tell me what. “Can you tell me what's wrong?”

“Nngg.” She clung to me.

 

I didn't manage to figure out what was bothering her, but she calmed down after awhile. She still freaked out sometimes when she was alone, but she kept closer to me, so that didn't happen as much.

It wasn't long before we got to the next port. “Come on, Terald, Silva! Let's go to the circus!” Arianna called to us, indicating a nearby poster.

“Nngg!” Morgana exclaimed. She turned to me. “Nngg-nngh!” I chuckled.

“Sure, we'll come.” I said.

We bought tickets and found our seats, with Morgana in between Arianna and I. “Have you ever seen this show before?” Arianna asked.

I nodded. “I did a long time ago. But not recently. It seems like I'm always in town at the wrong time. It'll be good to see it again.”

“Nngg.” Morgana tried to get up.

“Sit down, Silva.” I pushed her back. “The show will be starting soon.”

“Nngg.” She said, annoyed.

“Be patient, Silva.” Arianna said.

“Nngh!” Morgana said angrily.

Just then, a gaudily dressed showman came out. “Nngg!” Morgana exclaimed, pointing at him.

She enjoyed the show immensely. So did I, though it was mostly Arianna's company and Morgana's excitement that I enjoyed, more than the show itself. I doubted Morgana would have enjoyed it nearly as much before her injury. I couldn't imagine the old Morgana acting so delighted without anyone getting hurt.

“Nngg!” Morgana pointed at the lion tamer again.

 

When we got back to the ship, after I got Morgana to bed, Arianna and I got to talking. When she asked if I believed in love at first sight, I shook my head.

“Actually, I'm not sure I even believe in love. Or at least, not that kind. I like you, and I'd gladly have a fling with you.” I said. “But I'm not really capable of anything more. I have friends, and friends I have sex with, but I've never done well with having a serious partner. It's not something I desire, and it's never worked out well when I've tried.”

“Oh, that's fine.” Arianna said. “I'm not looking to settle down right now, either. My plan is to save my money, and then quit the sailing life and get married.”

“I'll never quit the sailing life.” I said. “I want to sail until I die.”

She chuckled. “Two ships passing in the night, then? Well, how about we have some fun while we're together?”

 

Over the next week, Morgana started having the trouble I'd dreaded—she started forgetting how to swab the deck. “Here, Silva, swab the deck.” I handed her the mop, and she just stared at it.

“Nngg?” She looked at me questioningly.

“Swab.” I put my hands over hers, and made her swab the deck. Then I let go.

“Nngg.” She swabbed tentatively a bit, then stopped to look at me again. “Nngg?”

“Swab the deck.” I urged her, using my hands to prompt her again. She looked confused, and then her face cleared.

“Nngh.” She started swabbing clumsily, and smiled at me proudly. “Nngg!”

“Good job, Silva!” I told her, then went off to do my job. As I worked, I wondered what to do. This time, she'd figured it out. But soon, she might forget how to swab altogether. Would she still have a place here? If she couldn't work...

And I hadn't told anyone she was losing skills. How would I explain that with the cover story I'd had? So far the others hadn't noticed the changes, but they'd certainly notice her not being able to swab the deck anymore.

I felt really sad to think about it. Would I need to find someone to leave her with? She seemed to have gotten pretty attached to me. I knew which 'nngg' meant she was happy, and which meant she was sad. And there was the illusion spell to think about. Someone else, changing her, would likely take the necklace off, which would reveal her true appearance.

I mulled over the problem quite a bit, without coming to a good answer.

 

Two days later, Captain Servanes found me trying to get Morgana to swab the deck. “Come on, Silva, do this.” I moved her hands, then let go.

“Nngg.” She said, staring blankly at the mop. “Nngg?”

“What's going on?” The captain asked.

“Nngg!” Morgana held out the mop.

“I don't know. She doesn't seem to know what I'm telling her to do.” I said. “I don't understand, she's done it so many times before.”

“Maybe she wants variety.” He said. “Well, there's other tasks she might be able to do. How would you like to wash dishes?”

“Nngh.” Morgana said.

“Or hold the sail while others tie it in place. I've seen her climb.” He said. “Come on, let's get you working.”

He got Morgana to wash dishes. “Nngg!” She said happily, splashing the water.

“OK, Silva, wash the dishes.” He made her rub the dish with a cloth.

“Nngg!” She dropped the cloth and rubbed the dish with her hands, grinning widely.

“Well, that works.” Captain Servanes said. He turned to me. “Is it just me, or has she been losing skills? I think I remember her nodding and shaking her head, but she's stopped doing that.”

“Nngg.” Morgana commented.

“Yeah, I guess.” I said. “Her cousin said she sometimes loses skills. I was hoping she wouldn't here.”

He nodded. “Don't worry. Even if she can't do any work, her sweet smile is enough to earn her a place on board. You could be our lady luck, hey, Silva? You'll charm away the gales with your smile.”

“Nngg.” Morgana held up a plate happily.

 

Captain Servanes' words reassured me. Morgana struggled at dishwashing and within a week she could no longer do it—though she enjoyed playing with the water, she didn't rub the dishes at all, just splashed around them. She could hold the sail while others tied it, and I hoped she would keep that. But even if she didn't, she had a place here.

“What do you want to wear?” I asked in exasperation, after Morgana had rejected three different shirts. I yanked the closet open. “Tell me which one you want!”

“Nngg.” Morgana said.

“Point it out.” I told her.

She looked confused. “Nngg!” She said, sounding exasperated, and looked at me expectantly. “Nngh-nngg!”

“I don't know what you want.” I told her. “Point to it.”

“Nngg?” She asked.

Was she forgetting how to point at things? I grabbed her hand and made it into a pointing gesture. “Like this.”

“Nngg.” She pulled her hand away and gestured at the shirts. At my confused look, she sighed—a surprisingly normal sound—then walked over and grabbed one shirt. “Nngg!”

“OK, then, let's put that on.” I took it from her and pulled it on. “Time for your pill, Morgana.” I pulled it out.

“Nngg.” She commented. I moved it towards her mouth, and she moved away. “Nngg!”

“You have to take it.” I grabbed her chin and held it. “Open your mouth.”

“Nngg!” She said, and I popped the pill in her mouth as she spoke. I grabbed a glass of water and poured it in. She gulped, barely avoiding choking. “Nngg!” She protested as soon as she'd finished.

“Good, let's go have breakfast.” I said, leading her away. She followed.

“Nngg.” She seemed to be calming down as we headed outside. I sighed. This was a particularly difficult morning.

“What got into you this morning?” I asked her. “You forgetting how to point at things?”

“Nngg.” Morgana said. “Nngh!” She pointed at the sail, then glanced back at me proudly. Well, scratch that theory. What was going on with her? What caused her odd behaviour?


End file.
